[Resources] So, you think you might be autistic?
An Auti-curious gal's guide to digging in, learning more, and moving forward
One of my main motivations for starting The Late Diagnosed Diaries was to catch the eye and ear of undiagnosed Autistic women and pique their curiosity.
In my wildest dreams, I like to imagine that I can help large numbers of undiagnosed Autistic women discover and better understand their autistic mind, ultimately leading them to live more accommodated, supported, happy, and fulfilled lives, with a kinder and more accepting view of themselves.
In that spirit, I want to provide a running list of resources that may be helpful if you find yourself thinking you may be an autistic woman, and wanting to dig into it further.
I must start, of course, with the standard caveats:
I’m not a doctor, just a journalistically trained autistic with lived experience, a lot of time spent researching, and a special interest in the autistic experience.
Having one or more of the traits represented in the resources below does not mean you’re definitely autistic.
Lacking some of the traits represented in the resources below does not mean you are not autistic.
Nothing here is meant to serve as a diagnosis, but the knowledge below can help pave a path to exploring clinical diagnosis, should you so desire.
But the barriers to an clinical diagnosis are immense for women (especially so for women of color, those who identify as LGBTQ, and those living in poverty) and the months-long wait for an assessment by a qualified professional can be punishing when you’re not exactly great at handling unknowns.
These are just some of the reasons that considered self-diagnosis is widely seen as valid within the autistic adult community. (Besides, the “aut” in “autistic” comes from the Greek word for “self.” We spend enough time in our heads that we really do know ourselves better than most others ever could. )
So, without further ado, here is a detailed list of resources for the Auti-curious woman wondering, “Could I be autistic?”
— This post will be updated over time. Last updated: October 2024.
** Content Warning About the Use of “Asperger Syndrome”
Online Assessments
There are a variety of online self-assessments you can take that can help support or quell your suspicions that you may be autistic.
Online or paper self-assessments should not be interpreted or used as a “formal diagnosis” but the results can help you determine how accurate your suspicions may be, and provide helpful context to any medical professionals you consult for a formal diagnosis down the line, should you choose to pursue one.
Many self-diagnosed autistic adults point to strong results on multiple assessments like these as part of their rationale for self-diagnosing.
I’ve written in the past about how weird the wording of some of these questions is, though, so it may be useful to review that piece for some insights on what to expect:
What to ask before taking an online autism assessment
Is the test coming from a reputable and unbiased source, or based on reputable and unbiased research?
Be aware that there are many online “autism tests” and “autism quizzes” put out by lifestyle bloggers and entertainment sites that are little more than a few stereotypes popped into a polling tool. These are not accurate tools for assessment.
Does this assessment require me to share personally identifying information (name, gender, birthday, etc.) and, if so, am I comfortable sharing that information?
Not all tests require this information, though some tests may use age and gender data to refine their questions, language, or recommendations.
Does this assessment require me to enter an email address to receive results, and, if so, am I comfortable sharing my email to receive my results
Not all tests require you to join an email marketing list to get results, but some may offer detailed PDF reports or other resources via email along with your results.
Online assessments to consider
RAADS-R (via Embrace Autism): This assessment, formally named the “Ritvo Autism Asperger Diagnostic Scale–Revised,” is designed for adults and has been scientifically validated (though that doesn’t make it perfect). This is a multiple-choice interactive assessment that will offer you a score at the end, along with context for what that score likely means. It’s got 70+ questions and could take 15-30 minutes to complete. The version linked here, from Embrace Autism, also has lots of helpful context for the test’s creation, validity, issues, and more.
Autism360’s Adult Autism Quiz: At just 40 questions, this interactive and scored assessment is about half the length of the RAADS-R linked above. The questions are organized into sections by purpose, which may help with understanding the questions themselves. It also has question types and formats that go beyond the typical multiple-choice; things like rating scales from 1 to 5, or choosing an emoji that best matches your emotion. This one does require your email to receive your results.
Samantha Craft’s Autism Trait Checklist for Women: This one is not an interactive or scorable assessment, but a long list of traits often found in Autistic women. Samantha Craft, of Spectrum Suite, has been going and updating this list for 10+ years based on not just DSM criteria, but her own autistic experience and community input. This list is often shared in communities for autistic women and is seen as a valuable and reliable trait list to reference.
Explore Autistic Women’s Narratives
One thing I found incredibly affirming in my early explorations of my autistic diagnosis was reading works written by adult autistic women, especially other late-diagnosed autistic women. Seeing so many of my experiences reflected in these narratives made me feel seen in a way I hadn’t in a long time, and in some cases, ever.
If you haven’t already, subscribing to this very newsletter, The Late Diagnosed Diaries, is a good place to start:
Books by Autistic Women
Strong Female Character, by Fern Brady. Comedian Fern Brady offers a raw and unfiltered look at the chaotic, emotional, and misunderstood years between her first suspicions of being autistic in her teens and her formal diagnosis at age 34. Reading this was a visceral experience, and this book gave me language for things I couldn’t otherwise articulate. I highly recommend the audiobook, so you can hear it in Fern’s own extremely Scottish voice. (Content Warning: Discussion of drug use, sexual situations, and domestic violence.) (Bookshop.org | Amazon)
Odd Girl Out: My Extraordinary Autistic Life, by Laura James. This reflective and vulnerable memoir focuses on the day-to-day experiences of journalist and writer, Laura James, who was diagnosed as autistic at the age of 45. It’s tamer than Fern Brady’s memoir above, but no less poignant and impactful. As a former journalist and mother, I found many parts of this book deeply reflective of my own experience. (Bookshop.org | Amazon)
Autism in Heels: The Untold Story of a Female Life on the Spectrum, by Jennifer Cook O’Toole. The author received her Asperger’s** diagnosis at 35, and this upbeat book serves as part memoir and part cheerleader. Jennifer Cook O’Toole works as an advocate and speaker, and she addresses the unique experience of female autistics with her unapologetically girly spirit. (Content warning: Discussion of eating disorders) (Bookshop.org | Amazon)
— Some of the book links above are affiliate links, which means I get a small commission on books sold, at no extra cost to you.
Connect Via Communities & Forums
Joining conversations with other autistic women has also been an immensely helpful experience, not only for the affirming nature of seeing my own life experiences and challenges reflected by others, but also for discovering new resources, tools, products, and other ideas for making Autistic living easier.
Reddit
Continued Research & Learning
Determining what to learn about or research next can be overwhelming, especially when there’s so much misinformation online. Here are some broadly trusted neurodiversity-affirming resources for you to explore.
General Resources
Welcome To The Autistic Community (AutismAcceptance.org)
Advice & Guidance for Autistic Adults (via National Autistic Society)
Topic-Specific Resources
Seeking Formal Diagnosis
Adult Autism Diagnosis Guide (via AutismAndHealth.org)
Getting and Autism Diagnosis As An Adult (via Harvard Health Resources)
How To Pursue an Autism Diagnosis as an Adult (via Cleveland Clinic)
Language & Identity
Neurodiversity Terms & Definitions (Neuroqueer.com)
How the Social Model of Disability Can Change How Society Views Autism (10m video from PBS Learning)
Identity-First Language: “Autistic” vs “person with autism” (via Autistic Self Advocacy Network)
Disability Language Guide (via National Center for Disability & Journalism)
Words to Know (AutismAcceptance.org)
Disclosure of Diagnosis
Autistic Disclosure Toolkit: A handy guide to help when coming out of The Autism Closet (from
)How and When to Disclose Your Autism (via Pathfinders For Autism)
Support & Assistance
Guide to Autism Therapies & Assistive Technology (via AutismAndHealth.org)
Applying for Social Security Disability Benefits with Autism (via Organization for Autism Research)
Employment & Accommodations
Autism Accommodation and Compliance (via Job Accommodation Network)
A Self-Advocate’s Guide to Employment Policy (via Autistic Self Advocacy Network)
Accessibility
List of Accessibility Resources (via Autistic Self Advocacy Network)
Rights & Protections
Americans with Disabilities Act Fact Sheet (via AutismSociety.org)
Disability Rights Laws (via AutismAndHealth.org)
Interagency Autism Coordinating Committee (US Dept. of Health & Human Services)
Advocacy
Civic Engagement Toolbox For Self-Advocates (via Autistic Self Advocacy Network)
Political & Social Issues Affecting Autistics (via Autistic Self Advocacy Network)
Checklist of Neurotypical Privilege (Au-Ti.com)
What now?
Comment: Use the comments section to share the tests, books, podcasts, communities, tools, and resources that have been or were helpful for you as you explored the possibility of your own autistic identity.
Share: If you know another Auti-curious woman, or if you found yourself thinking of a friend or relative while you were exploring this post, consider sharing it with them.
Subscribe: If you found this useful and want to hear more from me every other week or so, you can subscribe to this newsletter, The Late Diagnosed Diaries.
And one more thing…
Welcome, sister. 💜
It’s so wild that you just posted this. I know this is about women trying to figure things out but I had to chime in because I was just taking the RAADS assessment 5 minutes ago.
That test gave me so much anxiety. More than half the questions I wanted to answer “I don’t know how to answer this” or “what do you mean by ___?”
Everything was framed in yes/no terms when everything is contextual based upon the circumstance. Some of my answers would’ve been “yes but I was masking” or “no but I’m not sure what others thought.”
Anyway, I got a 152 this time only to discover I’d gotten 131 previously — forgot I took it before.
All this to say, I’m a white dude. If I’m who most of the tests were primarily designed around, I can’t imagine how hard these assessments are for anyone else with a different set of identities.
I may not have any resources to add to this list (yet!) but I wanted to say thank you. Thank you for sharing reliable assessments, including content warnings for the books, and making this whole journey a little less intimidating. I feel more capable of understanding my potential of being autistic.
My partner recently told me that this time and energy investment in exploring autism and neurodivergence in general is worth it. I’ve been sitting with the thought of being autistic since sometime last year. I’ve found acceptance around self diagnosing my ADHD. But similar to your post about anxiety vs autism… I’ve found that so much of my mental health is actually tied to a lack of support for my needs. So here we are.
Thank you again for providing resources and your human experience.