Re the noise thing, even just *knowing* it’s a ‘thing’ makes it easier to cope with somehow. I was at a busy networking event earlier this week and couldn’t hear the person speaking to my group over the very noisy hubbub. So I nodded along and kept up with the general gist and didn’t stress about the fact that I couldn’t hear the detail.
YES. Also, I try to frame it in a way that I'm not the problem. "It is too loud in here to hear a conversation" instead of "I can't hear the conversation." Somehow the framing makes it feel like, the environment is the issue, not me. (Similar to "These clothes are not the right size for my body" vs "I am not the right size for my clothes.")
Very relatable - I used to think my anxiety in shops, the bank, pharmacy etc was just my crippling social anxiety. Until I realised that my anxiety was actually being triggered by the fluorescent lighting. It’s staggering to think how many undiagnosed autistic people there must be out there.
Ah diagnosis. I finally self-diagnosed at 70 after recognizing myself in an article about parents who only realized they were autistic when their kids were diagnosed. Anything over 75 dB causes me physical pain in my ears. I love my noise-cancelling headphones.
My journey was similar - I recognized myself in video content by and about autistic women and then went down the rabbit hole of research from there. Thanks for sharing
Hi Melanie! I copied this by hand into my commonplace book. This blew my mind. I have always had to experience the world with my earphones in. I stopped doing so when my elders would comment about how it made me antisocial or seem rude. I was also told that I may just “get anxious in crowded places”. I’d experience meltdowns or shutdowns when I got home. I thought I wasn’t doing enough to take care of myself but I didn’t know what else to do.
I recently started using loops (noise-reducing earplugs) at work. It does help a little but honestly nothing works as well as noise-cancelling earphones for me. Being held and surrounded by music feels so good for me.
Thank you for sharing your experience. I’d like to try measuring the volume of my environment when I feel comfortable and when I start to feel uncomfortable. I don’t have an Apple Watch so maybe there’s an app or a small device. I never would have thought to do that!
Re the noise thing, even just *knowing* it’s a ‘thing’ makes it easier to cope with somehow. I was at a busy networking event earlier this week and couldn’t hear the person speaking to my group over the very noisy hubbub. So I nodded along and kept up with the general gist and didn’t stress about the fact that I couldn’t hear the detail.
YES. Also, I try to frame it in a way that I'm not the problem. "It is too loud in here to hear a conversation" instead of "I can't hear the conversation." Somehow the framing makes it feel like, the environment is the issue, not me. (Similar to "These clothes are not the right size for my body" vs "I am not the right size for my clothes.")
Ding ding ding! The environment isn’t right for us, rather than us not being right for the environment.
Very relatable - I used to think my anxiety in shops, the bank, pharmacy etc was just my crippling social anxiety. Until I realised that my anxiety was actually being triggered by the fluorescent lighting. It’s staggering to think how many undiagnosed autistic people there must be out there.
Ah diagnosis. I finally self-diagnosed at 70 after recognizing myself in an article about parents who only realized they were autistic when their kids were diagnosed. Anything over 75 dB causes me physical pain in my ears. I love my noise-cancelling headphones.
My journey was similar - I recognized myself in video content by and about autistic women and then went down the rabbit hole of research from there. Thanks for sharing
Hi Melanie! I copied this by hand into my commonplace book. This blew my mind. I have always had to experience the world with my earphones in. I stopped doing so when my elders would comment about how it made me antisocial or seem rude. I was also told that I may just “get anxious in crowded places”. I’d experience meltdowns or shutdowns when I got home. I thought I wasn’t doing enough to take care of myself but I didn’t know what else to do.
I recently started using loops (noise-reducing earplugs) at work. It does help a little but honestly nothing works as well as noise-cancelling earphones for me. Being held and surrounded by music feels so good for me.
Thank you for sharing your experience. I’d like to try measuring the volume of my environment when I feel comfortable and when I start to feel uncomfortable. I don’t have an Apple Watch so maybe there’s an app or a small device. I never would have thought to do that!
Oh my god, the decibel monitoring via Apple Watch is *so* smart! Thanks for sharing. I'll definitely be using that idea in the future.
It’s been such a help for me! It’s like outsourcing the interoception that I lack, helping me to monitor my own sensory overload.